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Now Reading
- Planned books:
- Martin the Warrior (Redwall, Book 6) by Brian Jacques
- The Bellmaker (Redwall, Book 7) by Brian Jacques
- Outcast of Redwall (Redwall, Book 8) by Brian Jacques
- The Pearls of Lutra (Redwall, Book 9) by Brian Jacques
- The Long Patrol (Redwall, Book 10) by Brian Jacques
- Marlfox (Redwall, Book 11) by Brian Jacques
- The Legend of Luke (Redwall, Book 12) by Brian Jacques
- Lord Brocktree (Redwall, Book 13) by Brian Jacques
- Taggerung (Redwall, Book 14) by Brian Jacques
- Triss (Redwall, Book 15) by Brian Jacques
- Current books:
- The Age of Spiritual Machines: When Computers Exceed Human Intelligence by Ray Kurzweil
- Into Thin Air: A Personal Account of the Mt. Everest Disaster by Jon Krakauer
- Recent books:
- Salamandastron (Redwall, Book 5) by Brian Jacques
- God’s Problem by Bart D. Ehrman
- John Adams by David McCullough
- Mariel of Redwall (Redwall, Book 4) by Brian Jacques
- Stick to Drawing Comics, Monkey Brain!: Cartoonist Ignores Helpful Advice by Scott Adams
- Planned books:
Eighteen children is not cute
If you haven’t already heard of the Duggar family from their show on the Discovery Channel, or from other various and sundry news reports that pop up every time Mr. & Mrs. Fecundity drop a new child into the world (every nine months), then let me sum it up for you: they’re a family of Quiverfulls, fundamentalist Christians that believe it’s they’re responsibility to keep having sex without protection and raise as many children as that lifestyle produces. Meanwhile, they dress like the polygamists from Texas and creep out just about everyone they meet. It seems like only yesterday that I was reading some puff piece about her 17th child; now it’s up to 18:
The Duggar kids planned a big Mother’s Day surprise for their mom this year. But the surprise was on them when Michelle Duggar announced on the TODAY Show that they were soon to welcome an 18th sibling.
“We’re expecting!” the happy mother told TODAY co-host Meredith Vieira and the entire Arkansas clan. “Number 18!
[...]
Joshua, the Duggars’ eldest son, said the news, two days before Mother’s Day was “a shock” — if only to a point.
“I wasn’t expecting that,” the 20-year-old said. “But it’s been nine months [since the birth of the last baby], so yeah.”
I love the eldest son’s reaction: oh, right, it’s been the minimum possible amount of time since her last pregnancy, so of course she’s got another bun in the oven. You think maybe young Joshua is starting to get the feeling that his family is nuts?
But because they say that God told them to keep squirting out babies, then it’s all right. And they’ll keep doing it until they have another miscarriage due to the monstrous abuse of her vagina. But that one won’t be God’s fault.
See “Multiply and Conquer” at Bitch magazine for more good stuff.
Tagged religion, sociologyFriday Random Ten CLVI
The “Military juntas are bad” edition.

- She & Him - [Volume One #10] Got Me
- Isobel Campbell And Mark Lanegan - [Ballad Of Broken Seas #01] Deus Ibi Est
- Pineapple Thief - [8 Days #03] Tuesday November 5th
- Jellyfish - [Spilt Milk #10] He’s My Best Friend
- Ephel Duath - [Pain Necessary To Know #07] Vector
- Aeon Spoke - [Above The Buried City #01] No Answers
- Nine Inch Nails - [Ghosts I-IV CD1 #08] Ghosts I
- Black Ox Orkestar - [Nisht Azoy #01] Bukharian
- Jethro Tull - [A Passion Play #13] Flight From Lucifer
- Mastodon - [Remission #06] Burning Man
Why Orwell Matters
It’s been too long since I had any Christopher Hitchens video love here. Here he is giving a speech based on his book about George Orwell.
October 21, 2002 @ The Commonwealth Club.
Tagged Christopher Hitchens, literature, politics, videoSalamandastron
See the rest of this year’s listings • What is 52 Books in 52 Weeks?
№39
Title: Salamandastron [$]
Author: Brian Jacques
Publisher: Philomel
Year: 1993
Pages: 400
It may behoove you to read the previous book in this series, Mattimeo
Continuing a theme that’s been developing for a number of books now, Jacques takes parallel narratives to extremes in this latest installment of the famed Redwall series.
I think perhaps Salamandastron, the mountain inhabited by a Badger Lord and his army of hares, has been mentioned in just about every Redwall book so far. Jacques likes furious badger lords only slightly less than he likes warrior mice, apparently. But this is the most badger-focused novel yet, featuring no fewer than four simultaneously-living badgers, and several more historically. Unfortunately, while the hares are perhaps one of the most enjoyable races in Jacques’ universe, the badger/hare/Salamandastron dynamic is pretty two-dimensional. Badger lords, served by hares, have always ruled the mountain, or so we’re told, and continue to do so pretty much only because it’s always been done. Unlike Redwall, which is in the middle of verdant country, Salamandastron is in the middle of a dry and hot region, and so holds little real appeal, other than it sits at the center of a lot of searat travels. So, every so often, an otherwise benevolent badger lord will get a bug up his arse and go into berserker rage out in the beach, taking down scores of enemies with his superhuman strength.
This, as happened in Mossflower, is one part of the plot in Salamandastron; I’m not afraid to tell you this because it’s as much a part of the badger species as evil is to stoats, rats, weasels, foxes and ferrets; as much as a gruff and tenuous benevolence is part of many birds of prey; as much hares are wisecracking warriors with bottomless stomachs. This is important because Salamandastron toys more than ever with a theme that is simultaneously the most interesting, the most frustrating, and the most oft-criticized aspect of the Redwall novels: creatures are typecast, invariably. You’ll find some shades of grey; for instance, selfish hermit squirrels or shrews more combative than usual. But vermin are always vermin, even when you think they might turn out to be good. Early in this book, two vermin fleeing the band of another merciless tyrant find their way to Redwall, where they—despite 100% statistical evidence that they will cause harm—are let into the abbey, fed, clothed, and left to their own devices, to a certain extent. Initially, they seem to enjoy the place, and live in relative peace, although they soon kill an abbey member by accident, steal the sword of Martin the Warrior, and flee. You’ll see this same kind of inevitable fulfillment of stereotypes even more prominently in The Outcast of Redwall, a few books down the line.
The escaping vermin are pursued by two young abbey members; their original vermin horde tries to invade Salamandastron; a young badger, Mara, and her hare friend, Pikkle Ffolger, go off questing; Redwall Abbey suffers a sudden plague called Dryditch fever; an otter and a baby dormouse go questing to find the only known remedy and meet a lot of birds along the way. Jacques really stretched himself thin trying to maintain this many distinct plot threads, and I could really tell in places: many of the items felt more perfunctory than normal, and I had to resist the urge to skip paragraphs or entire pages, knowing inevitably what would happen.
Ultimately, I think Salamandastron is one of the weaker Redwall novels, especially among the earlier ones; Jacques seems like he was phoning in this one, throwing his trusty tropes into a bag and swinging it at a wall until it was good and messy. It’s not bad, but as one entry in a long line of good fantasy novels, it rather pales in comparison to its siblings.
Tagged 52 Books in 52 Weeks, books, fantasy, fiction, memes, reviewsGod’s Problem
See the rest of this year’s listings • What is 52 Books in 52 Weeks?
№38
Title: God’s Problem [$]
Author: Bart D. Ehrman
Publisher: HarperOne
Year: 2008
Pages: 304
Bart D. Ehrman is a compelling scholar, or so I’m told. I was entirely underwhelmed by his previous work, The Lost Gospel of Judas, which was largely a historical curiosity with a lot of directed Biblical scholarship; neither moving nor groundbreaking. I was unaware that Ehrman had written another book until I stumbled across it just recently; I decided to read it, hoping it would be a better indication of the author’s writing ability.
God’s Problem is really two interwoven threads. One is largely personal, and partly narrative: Ehrman tells us the story of his change from a fundamentalist Christian (Moody Bible Institute, Wheaton College, &c.) to an agnostic, and states quite bluntly that his fall from faith was predicated upon the problem of suffering in the world. It’s stated mostly famous by Epicurus, often retold in much simplified versions because there is no canonical version. The problem is this:
God either wishes to take away evils and is unable; or he is able and is unwilling; or he is neither willing nor able; or he is both willing and able. If he is willing but unable he is feeble, which is not in accordance with the character of God. If he is able and unwilling, he is envious, which is equally at variance with God. If he is neither willing nor able, he is both envious and feeble, and therefore not God. If he is both willing and able, which alone is suitable for God, from what source then are evils? Or why does he not remove them?
This particular problem was neologized by Leibniz as “theodicy”1, and it’s been one of the more complicated and storied cases for Judeo-Christian apologists. This problem, which Ehrman reveals he taught as a course early in his career, was his ultimate cause for disbelief, and he proposes early in the book to study the problem and the various and sundry ways that we’ve answered it.
While Ehrman makes his own convictions known, the book itself mostly reads as a textual and historical survey of theodicy rather than an argument for or against something—I’d chalk this up to Ehrman’s continuing interest in and respect for Christian intellectualism. This is a convoluted way of saying that despite the title of the book, it shouldn’t be something that committed theists are afraid to me: the bulk of it is dedicated to nothing more than explaining how different groups, and different authors of Biblical texts, have explained the presence of “evil” in the world.
One thing that does eventually irritate me about the book, however, is the same Ehrman dedicates to creating specific and overly-long examples of suffering. That is to say, instead of letting his readers tacitly acknowledge that yes, there is suffering in the world, he spends a great deal of time setting up examples of Khmer Rouge-led Cambodia, the Holocaust, sick and suffering children, &c. This particular tactic smells a little like propaganda to me, although Ehrman’s contextualizing hints that many people don’t quite appreciate the issue until it’s laid explicitly in front of them.
There are a lot of things to say about theodicy, and God’s Problem shouldn’t be considered a definitive work by any means: the Wikipedia entry for theodicy lists many more explanations that Ehrman does, for instance. The difference, I suppose, is that Ehrman has his New Testament scholar and (former) practicing evangelical bona fides, and he really does do a good job bringing his extensive knowledge of the Bible and extra-Biblical text to this theodician history.
The first theory that Erhman covers is the idea that God causes suffering as a punishment for straying from his commands (what’s known as the “Classical” view of suffering). For examples of this, see, well, most of the Old Testament. The Jewish god could be a real dick sometimes: this is principally Ehrman’s argument against the efficacy of such a reasoning, namely that the enslavement, death, and continued persecution of his chosen people is hardly a satisfying, theologically, especially to the latter-day Christians, who have largely transformed the Old Testament god into a much nicer, self-realized version of himself, replete with a salvific crucifixion. There’s a big difference between the stern father and one who will kill children just to make a point. With enough torturous logic, you could justify it, perhaps, but surely, Ehrman argues, there must be better.
And indeed, even though the author likely spends the most time on this first explanation (due, in part, to its relative surfeit of textual evidence), there are in fact other ways of approaching theodicy. The next explanation is possibly the most popular form with Christians: suffering exists because free will allows some sinful people to act cruelly toward others. That is to say, Adam & Eve –> sin –> fallen nature –> suffering. The obvious problem with this viewpoint, Ehrman supposes, is suffering that isn’t the responsibility of humans: literal “acts of god,” in insurance parlance, don’t appear to be the end result of human action; they are either built into the nature of the world, or they are created spontaneously by God, both of which are problematic in thinking of about suffering.
Thirdly, there is redemptive suffering: specifically, we experience suffering so that we may be better people. This, too, has a gloss of respectability, Ehrman says, except when you consider all of the fringe cases. Even if you could argue that losing a child in an accident makes a mother a better person (stronger, more faithful, what-have-you), you could hardly say the same for the child. Despite what seems like a lot of exceptions to the rule, the idea of redemptive suffering has become the theological cornerstone of Christianity, as seen in the passion of Jesus.
Finally, Ehrman discusses another viewpoint associated with Jesus and his close followers: apocalyptic2 suffering. Simply put, this is the idea that suffering is fine now because we’ve got much better things coming that will make it all worth it. There are two levels to this: to early apocalyptic writers (Ehrman mentions Paul as an example), contemporary suffering is irrelevant, since divine deliverance is soon at hand. 2000 years later, the idea of “soon” has changed somewhat, but the idea that suffering in the here and now pales in comparison to the rewards of the afterlife is very much a part of the fabric of Christian doctrine. Ehrman, ever the dedicated agnostic, thinks this little consolation for all that happens in this world (insert his many descriptive examples, for the fourth or fifth time).
In the end, I’d say God’s Problem is a bit of an answer without a problem. Although it’s an excellent survey of historical and current Christian teachings regarding theodicy, its contextual problems—the author’s own revulsion to suffering and its effects on his faith—aren’t likely to sway any reader on any side of the debate. I think Ehrman understands this (he appears to disclaim as much), and yet much of his personal narrative, injected between textual analyses, appears worded to provoke just such an event. Theodicy is a very real topic of debate that continues to inform sermons even today, and remains relevant as long as the world continues to appear an arbitrary and cruel place. I knew, generally, of the arguments for suffering, having heard of and contemplated Epicurus’ (in)famous proposal long ago, but it was nice to get lot of textual information with which to frame the subject.
I still haven’t been entirely convinced of Ehrman’s ability as a writer (perhaps I simply need to go ahead and read Misquoting Jesus, which appears to be a fan favorite), even though I accept his reputation as a scholar. God’s Problem suffered at times from its own maudlin sympathies, relying too hard on an argument from empathy in a work that proposed a scholarly debate.
- from Greek θεός (theós, “god”) and δίκη (díkē, “justice”).[↩]
- I should stress here, like Ehrman does, that “apocalyptic” in this context does not refer to either the Mad Max or the Revelations versions, but is literally after the Greek αποκαλυψις, or disclosure, and simply meant a revelation, not necessarily a world-ending event[↩]
Signs that you’re incorrigibly nerdy
- Reading an 8-year thread of responses to a longstanding Gecko bug makes for interesting reading.
- You can list at least four different ways to create italicized text on a web page, as well as the semantic importance of each1
- You laugh at the joke about the pluperfect subjunctive scrod2.
- You like xkcd; even worse: you understand the humor more than half the time.
- Point releases are still very important.
- Whenever you see a computer (real life or on television), you try to determine what operating system or browser it’s running.
- For the record,
<em>is for emphasis;<i>is for things which have to be stylistically emphasized, such as foreign language;<cite>is for textual citations like books or movies; finally, there’s the CSS declarationfont-style:italic, which can be attached to any HTML element that requires stylistic italicizing but doesn’t need an inline tag.[↩] - Once again, for the record, the “pluperfect subjunctive” line makes no technical sense, but was likely chosen because it sounds appropriately grammatical. Besides, English-speakers call it “past perfect” instead of “pluperfect;” nor, I believe, does the question in question contain any subjunctive verbs anyway. Some will tell you that there is no such construct as a pluperfect subjunctive, but they are wrong. Still, a hearty laugh for one of our few true grammar jokes.[↩]
Friday Random Ten CLV
The “Students are gone” edition.

- Coldplay - [A Rush of Blood to the Head #04] The Scientist
- Queens of the Stone Age - [Era Vulgaris #02] Sick, Sick, Sick
- VAST - [April #10] She Visits Me
- Jason Falkner - [Can You Still Feel? #02] Author Unknown
- Unicorn - [Emotional Wasteland #05] Suddenly
- Do Make Say Think - [Goodbye Enemy Airship The Landlord Is Dead #06] Bruce E Kinesis
- Novembre - [Classica #01] Cold Blue Steel
- December - [The Lament Configuration #03] Waiting For Pain
- Extol - [Mesmerized #01] Enthralled
- Collective Soul - [Afterwords #07] Good Morning After All
John Adams
See the rest of this year’s listings • What is 52 Books in 52 Weeks?
№37
Title: John Adams [$]
Author: David McCullough
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Year: 2002
Pages: 752
I will admit immediately that I am not a great reader of history, or even of autobiography. I read just about anything and everything, but for whatever reason, have read very few things that I would call straight-up “history;” anything I have has had some sort of twist that bends that narrative around an a priori1. I probably would never have picked up anything by David McCullough if my girlfriend’s brothers hadn’t gotten me John Adams as a birthday gift; fans of 1776 and history in general, they wanted to share with me just a bit of their geekiness, and I must say it was a success.
John Adams is one of those names that everybody knows but, if pressed, probably couldn’t say much about. George Washington was the general of the revolutionary army during the war, and the first president under the Constitution2; Thomas Jefferson was the author of the Declaration of Independence, and eventually president; James Madison was the impetus behind the Constitution, and also eventually president.
But John Adams? What of him? He was president, we remember, though we don’t know where in the order; he was involved in the Revolutionary War, maybe, unless that was somebody else with a powdered wig and a generic New Englander name. In fact, there is a long and storied history to John Adams, if you couldn’t surmise that from the 752-page length of the book in question, and there’s a hell of a lot that I didn’t know, and I considered myself on the happy side of the bell curve when it comes to knowledge 3.
One of the most interesting things about John Adams isn’t even in the book, unless you bother to read the author’s notes at the end: most of his information, and a good deal of his quotes, came from the writings of John Adams himself, which, along with the writing of his wife Abigail and, I assume, many related writings, are proudly kept in a collection by the Massachusetts Historical Society. Adams has the distinction of being a truly verbose writer: his written words outnumber those of any other president; his predilection for journal-writing, and his habit of letter-writing, give us a monstrously large written record of his thoughts and opinions during much of his life. This in and of itself is singularly astonishing, and singularly interesting.
Adams was a rural Massachusetts man, plagued his entire life by an odd mix in insecurity and unchecked ambition, was in fact never fond of politics, of or the big city. Like Thomas Jefferson, he was most at home on his farm, with his family, and despite spending a large chunk of his life abroad and overseas, was very much what I’d describe as an “accidental tourist.” After establishing a modest law practice, he found himself embroiled in the Continental Congress as the Revolutionary War reared its ugly head. For much of the war itself, Adams was actually in France or Holland, playing diplomat and attempting to gain either military support (France) or financial support (Holland), at which he succeeded to varying degrees. He did not get along with Benjamin Franklin, who, it must be said, McCullough paints as a senile, cultured, smooth-talking fop, in which he is at least partially right.
The author spends some time discussing Adams contributions to the political writings of the time: Thoughts on Government a book written by Adams in 1776, was probably at least as influential as Thomas Paine’s Common Sense, though you rarely hear the former mentioned. Adams was also largely responsible for the Constitution of the State of Massachusetts, which was the first of its kind and a model to its followers. Adams’ fondness for a strong executive branch (he also championed the independent judiciary) would later get him labeled as a monarchist and a lackey to the British Crown, though we as modern readers can appreciate such an idea with the benefit of hindsight.
Then, of course, there is Adams’ vice-presidency (under Washington), and his presidency (he was the second, with a vice-president of Jefferson), which are interesting for a variety of reasons. First, for the first few president elections, the president and vice-president were first- and second-place finishers, respectively. There were no such things as “running mates.” I think this is both the greatest and worst idea in presidential politics, but it didn’t last very long in any case. Secondly, we all like to bitch and moan about how modern presidential campaigns are mud-slinging battles, and the media are a bunch of fear-mongering bastards and yellow journalists, but certainly this isn’t a product of the 20th century: as early as John Adams, newspapers took presidential hopefuls out back and violated them, figuratively-speaking. I was amazed how vitriolic the newspapers of the day were when talking about just about any politician after Washington, who was—generally—immune from criticism by some unspoken pact. It’s little wonder that Adams was more than glad to be done with government (after many years in France, and Britain, and Holland, and Philadelphia, and Washington D.C.), and retire to his farm, where the rotund sexagenarian seemed to take an immense joy in farming and the associated domesticity.
There are many more things that McCullough covers in the life of John Adams, but for my purposes I will mention just one more, and this perhaps the longest-running and most prevalent of the book’s theme: John Adams was a lover. He courted and married Abigail when he was about 30 years of age, and she a bit younger. While much can be said about, say, Jefferson’s indiscretions with his slaves, or the various mistresses of the French leaders with whom Adams politicked during the war, he was by all accounts completely and totally devoted to his wife. It was remarkable, really: even after the flower of their youth, during which we may write such romance off as naïveté or mere horniness, Adams seemed to genuinely need his wife, pining for her while he was away from home. He seemed to draw strength from her presence, her intellect, her courage, and her love, and McCullough dwells on this, assuming it to be one of Adams’ most redeeming features. It might vary depending on who’s reading, but I happen to agree with the author. Looking at the letters between husband and wife, which are well-documented and which McCullough quotes extensively, one can’t help but feel a bit wistful at the apparent depth and purity of the two New Englanders’ relationship; I myself grew somewhat melancholy and wistful reading it while I was in Anaheim, away from my own girlfriend.
There has been plenty of criticism of John Adams for its shortcomings, among them understressing the importance of Adams as a political philosopher and public intellectual, and perhaps dwelling overlong on mundane and ultimately unimportant details culled from the volume of Adams’ correspondence. Still and all, I found the book, though lagging a bit at times, to be generally a wonderful read. McCullough has a rare ability to turn historical information into a gripping narrative without sensationalizing or fabricating; John Adams really is a story, rather than a collection of data, and it shows off not only the illustrious life of one of America’s most important individuals, but also McCullough’s skills as a historian, biographer, and writer.
- c.f. Tom Standage’s A History of the World in 6 Glasses as an example.[↩]
- I have gotten into vicious arguments with teachers when I argue that technically, the first president of the “United States of America” was John Hanson, appointed to the position under the Articles of Confederation. One could argue that two different articles of law equate to two different nation-states, but I’d argue otherwise[↩]
- Keep your smarmy remarks to yourself.[↩]