Could there be a more awkward way to evangelize than to use “Chuck Norris Facts”123? This is by Norris himself, mind you.

Alleged Chuck Norris Fact: “Chuck Norris’ tears can cure cancer. Too bad he never cries. Ever.”

There was a man whose tears could cure cancer or any other disease, including the real cause of all diseases – sin. His blood did. His name was Jesus, not Chuck Norris.

If your soul needs healing, the prescription you need is not Chuck Norris’ tears, it’s Jesus’ blood.

…. well then.

  1. When Chuck Norris jumps into a pool, he does not get wet: the water gets Chuck.[]
  2. There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.[]
  3. Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.[]
§1477 · October 24, 2006 · Tags: , ·

3 Comments to “Chuck Norris: “Yes, but have you heard about Jesus?””

  1. Jackilyn says:

    Jesus is such a cool dude.

  2. Ben says:

    I hear he gives wicked-awesome dating tips.

  3. Yeah… as a uhh… (shh… Christian)… I uhh… I think I want to cry (and my tears don’t heal).

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