A Modest Construct

We a got new cat, a large 8-month Siamese male that we named Simon. So far, of our three other cats, one cowers under a bed all day, one merely gets pissed off when Simon tries to play, and one went outside and disappeared (she’s been gone for a week now).

Needless to say, I don’t think we’ll be able to keep Simon. He needs to be the only cat in a household, which we naturally can’t provide. It also doesn’t help that my mother and father refuse to let him outside unattended, so instead he sits inside, meowing at birds through the windows and picking fights with the other cats. Something needs to be done.

Last night, I locked him in my parent’s bedroom so he wouldn’t attack anybody while I slept. The night before, he hit the cowardly cat, Tiny, while he was eating, because I woke up and the food and water was scattered about the laundry room and Tiny was in hiding.

I went swimming yesterday and managed to freeze my butt off. My girlfriend is lucky she’s so damn persuasive, or I would have stayed dry. My nipples could have cut glass. Later, I won a game of Clue, almost won a game of Life (I scored a $100,000 and had more kids than a Chinese rabbit), and was soundly thrashed by my girlfriend in Egyptian Ratscrew/Nuclear War.

Tonight, I plan on building a computer for my mother’s boss, for whom I do computer consultation. She needed a new one, and rather than pay Dell for a piece of crap (she’s extremely unhappy with the Optiplex systems she bought last fall), she had me order parts from NewEgg and build her one. 2GHz Athlon XP processor, 512mb OCZ PC2700 RAM, WD 80gb HDD, a cheap Maxtop case, three fans, Asus mobo with VIA chipset (integrated NIC, video, and audio), a 17″ BenQ LCD monitor (which cost as much as the tower in its entirety), and I’ll throw in a cheap keyboard and mouse that I have laying around.

If she likes it, I’ll be building a similar one for the Doctor’s office. It’ll look great on a resumè, too: “Information Systems Consultant for small business network” or something like that. Actually, my job titles as of today would look something like this:

• Caretaker/Groundskeeper for 12-apartment complex. Some experience in painting, plumbing, cleaning, carpentry. 5 years, current.
• Medical Records staff for 4-doctor urology office. 3 months.
• Assistant Web Developer for a private university. Experience includes information upkeep, new content creation, and some graphic design. 1 year, current.
• Information Systems Consultant for 4-doctor urology office. Experience includes some network administration, new hardware installation, workstation creation, maintenance, and repair. 1 year, current.

Not bad for a pissant little college kid that never did anything in high school, eh? If I had played sports or something instead of sitting at my computer, I wouldn’t be where I am.

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